Next Journey through IVF

I haven't posted in a while, I know.  Life happens sometimes.  I had surgery in April of 2010 where they removed scar tissue from when my appendix burst at 2 yrs old.  I also had a mass - of what I don't know - covering up my ovary.  I tried a few more medicated cycles after that because I thought for sure my surgery had been the answer and I would be able to get pregnant.
I was wrong.
My OB basically threw me away, said there was nothing else he could do.
In March of 2011 I went to a RE (reproductive endocrinologist), he gave me the matter of fact news.  My tubes are blocked.  It is impossible for me to conceive a child on my own.  My only option is IVF.  So next was to save up the $12,000 for an IVF cycle.  As of now it is sitting in my savings account just waiting to be used.

Heres my problem.  What if it doesn't work?  I am terrified it won't.  Then I would have to spend the next year saving up that money again to try again, and still without the satisfaction of knowing for sure whether it will work.  This is the hardest journey I have ever had to face.  I want so badly to have a child of my own, on my bad days I wonder why me?  Why can't I just get pregnant like everyone else.  Why do I have to be the one that spends thousands for a glimmer of a chance.  Why couldn't the people who have to struggle be the ones that don't want children to begin with?  No one can answer my questions I suppose.  But here we go as I embark a new level of my journey with infertility.  IVF. 

I have already gotten most of my tests done, only one left to do and thats infectous disease pannel.  They tested my ovaries to make sure they would stim (produce eggies) well, I got the OK on that.  I want to do IVF right now, but I know patientice is a virtue right?  So we will hopefully do it around the end of July into August.  It will be a month long process with pain, needles, LOTS of shots, and my dignity thrown away.  My, what I hope to be, furture childs life will begin in a test tube, well congrats kiddo, we spent your college fund making ya!  Hope your just glad to be here. 
On that note, time for me to sign off, I will try to come back as often as possible.  Not like anyone really reads my stuff, but it helps me to get it out.