INJECTS!!!!

I am finally doing injects (injections for IVF).  Tomorrow will be my 7th day of them. OUCH!!! Someone forgot to mention that the needle itself wouldn't hurt but the medication and the pain in my ovaries would SUCK!  I have every single side effect - as my nurse says, I am one of the "unlucky ones"! Just super right? 
Yesterday I went in for my 7 day ultra sound and blood work to see how my follices are growing.  I have 30 follies growing but they weren't as big as they should have been.  SOOOO they had to up my medication!  So now I am up to 3 shots a day and within the next couple days I will be doing 4.  I seriously hope this works!
My wonderful side effects that they forgot to mention are - Severe bloating (looks like I am about 9 months pregnant after my injects), worst migraines I have ever had, so dizzy I can barely stand most of the time, shooting pains through my stomach, my poor ovaries feel like punching bags for professional boxers, and if you even come near my stomach I may knock you out!  Ugh, I can do this.  Not to much longer and I will get to do egg retrieval, then transfer and hopefully 9 months see my beautiful perfect baby that is going to be a hell child because it has already caused mommy so much pain and it isn't even concieved yet!

I go back in tomorrow for a 9 day scan to see how the follies are doing since they increased the meds, hopefully they are finally going to be over achievers and shock the doctors at how many and how perfect they are!  ---Hey, I can dream right?---

I do have to say one thing.  I have the most amazing, caring, loving husband in the world!  Even going through all this pain I am falling more in love with him because of how amazing he has been through this whole thing :)

Stay tuned - more to come...

Hopefully will start IVF soon!!

I have had a few RE appointments since I posted last.  We got our infectious disease pannels done to make sure we don't have any icky diseases we might pass down.  My IVF meds are ordered!! As long as my period comes (please please please!!!!!) on or before the 20th of June I can start my injects!!  I have never wanted AF (aunt flow) to show more then I do now! But if she doesn't arrive on time it will push our date back to the endish of August :( I am just going to hope and pray that it does.  If so we will be doing ER (egg retrieval) on July 3rd and ET (embryo transfer) around the 6th or 8th of July.  Then I would take my HPT (home pregnancy test) around July 18th...my mommas birthday!!  I hope everything works out and I get pregnant.  I know everyone says that, and everyone wants it to work, but please please please let it be me!!

I will be giving myself 2-3 shots a day for about 20 days, but I don't care!!! As long as it works I would do anything! 

Next Journey through IVF

I haven't posted in a while, I know.  Life happens sometimes.  I had surgery in April of 2010 where they removed scar tissue from when my appendix burst at 2 yrs old.  I also had a mass - of what I don't know - covering up my ovary.  I tried a few more medicated cycles after that because I thought for sure my surgery had been the answer and I would be able to get pregnant.
I was wrong.
My OB basically threw me away, said there was nothing else he could do.
In March of 2011 I went to a RE (reproductive endocrinologist), he gave me the matter of fact news.  My tubes are blocked.  It is impossible for me to conceive a child on my own.  My only option is IVF.  So next was to save up the $12,000 for an IVF cycle.  As of now it is sitting in my savings account just waiting to be used.

Heres my problem.  What if it doesn't work?  I am terrified it won't.  Then I would have to spend the next year saving up that money again to try again, and still without the satisfaction of knowing for sure whether it will work.  This is the hardest journey I have ever had to face.  I want so badly to have a child of my own, on my bad days I wonder why me?  Why can't I just get pregnant like everyone else.  Why do I have to be the one that spends thousands for a glimmer of a chance.  Why couldn't the people who have to struggle be the ones that don't want children to begin with?  No one can answer my questions I suppose.  But here we go as I embark a new level of my journey with infertility.  IVF. 

I have already gotten most of my tests done, only one left to do and thats infectous disease pannel.  They tested my ovaries to make sure they would stim (produce eggies) well, I got the OK on that.  I want to do IVF right now, but I know patientice is a virtue right?  So we will hopefully do it around the end of July into August.  It will be a month long process with pain, needles, LOTS of shots, and my dignity thrown away.  My, what I hope to be, furture childs life will begin in a test tube, well congrats kiddo, we spent your college fund making ya!  Hope your just glad to be here. 
On that note, time for me to sign off, I will try to come back as often as possible.  Not like anyone really reads my stuff, but it helps me to get it out.

Had my surgery :)

Well I had the surgery yesterday.  I had a laparoscopy with lysis of adhesions and a tuboplasty.  I was so worried they wouldn't find anything but to my surprise there was quite a bit of stuff.  So I am not crazy about all the pain I have had!!  He found a mass that was on the end of my tube that connected to my ovary, which meant that tube was completely blocked.  Then on my other tube it was wrapped in scar tissue and kinked off then the scar tissue connected it to my abdominal wall.  So both tubes were blocked which is possibly why I haven't been able to get pregnant.  AND which explains why I had such a painful and long HSG (dye test of the tubes) the nurse told me the pain was all in my head...I have one thing to say to you, EFF YOU!!! He also was able to remove several cysts.  So I am really hoping this will do it and my TTC journey will be able to end very soon.  I just can't wait to get started again, I will have so much hope for my upcoming cycle. 

Surgery Date....

I scheduled my surgery!! April 16th! I can't wait, I just really hope it does the trick and isn't a waste of time and money.  If this doesn't work I guess we will be moving on to IVF.  :(  Really don't want to have to take that route, it will take a while before we could save up that kind of money.  Please pray for me.

Surgery....

Well, OB thinks I need to have the Laparoscopy done, he thinks I do have scar tissue in my tubes.  Sooo, he believes that if it is going to look like he think it will my only chances of conceiving will be with IVF.  I have to schedule the Lap/Tuboplasty(where they scrape scar tissue off the ends of the tubes). 

On top of all this I think my stress level is affecting my heart.  Been having a weird heart beat and chest pains...had to wear a walking EKG for a day.  Waiting for my results.  Hmm, really hoping I won't have to stop trying to conceive :( I think I would be really depressed.  I am already depressed enough with everything going on. 

I could really use some good news or something, tired of all the downers.

AF...

Well good ole Aunt Flow showed up yesterday..yay me.  Everyone keeps telling me that I should be happy that it has came on its own the last two months, but that isn't what I want.  If I wanted to get my freaking period every month I would just get on birth control, but no, I want a baby.  So please forgive me if I am not beside myself happy about her showing her ugly face.  Yeah, it's great that my body actually did "something" it was supposed to do, but...I still can't get it to do what I want.  I know I know, "but this means you are one step closer." Right now, I really don't give a rats ass.  It pisses me off so bad that so many ppl are able to pop out kids left and right and here I sit cycle, after cycle and I am supposed to be happy that I got my period! My cycles are dwindling down.  I can only take 6 cycles of Clomid and then I am done, money/insurance stops there.  No more, nadda.  I have 4 left.  We can't afford IUI or IVF and it would take years to save that kind of money, $15,000...who has that just lying around to give to someone on the pure "hope" that it will work.  It's like paying a dealership 15 grand and "hoping" they give you a car, you wouldn't do it!  If fact you wouldn't give anyone that kind of money if they said "well, lets hope this works".  I guess if you were a gambler and had that kind of money you would but any sane person would not. 

Hubby and I have talked about what we might do but he just thinks it would cost to much money to do either of those....I do to, but shouldn't I be given a fair freaking chance.  I am just so glad that some ppl can have babies with NO problem, but I can't even have the chance to have a chance.

Ugh, really mad.  Another wasted month of my life down the drain.....woopty do! 

PID??....

Back in November when I did my HSG (dye test to check fallopian tubes) the dye went through my tubes slower then it was supposed to, the doc said it might be scar tissue.  Well nothing else was said after that.  My OB never went over the results with me or said anything about the scar tissue.  Well I have done 2 rounds of clomid and a natural cycle, I ovulated, with timed intercourse and still not pregnant.  Sooo I was sitting here wondering why in the heck would I have scar tissue in my tubes??? So I did a search on the reasons why I would and the results completely shocked me!!  The first thing that came up was a "ruptured appendix".  When I was 2 years old my appendix ruptured, and I had an infection from it.  If you have an infection in your lower abdomin that is not completely treated it causes PID which is Pelvic Inflammatory Disease, after months/years going untreated it turns the infection into scar tissue in or around the area (...fallopian tubes, ovaries...etc).  Soo what I want to know is if it is so difficult for dye, which is a liquid, to get through my tubes then how could sperm or a fertilized egg get through???

I am going to see my OB Wednesday and tell him my opinion and ask why he isn't concerned with the scar tissue, and why he never asked why I had the scar on my abdomin or even if I had, had any previous surgeries.  Then I am going to request an operative laparoscopy, which is where they insert a small tube, that has a telescope, below my bellybutton and get a closer look at all my reproductive organs and then from there they will scrap any scar tissue from in or around the tubes/uterus/ovaries.....Not sure if this is my problem or not but it is worth a shot!!

Virginia...

Well my husband got some job offers for going back to the railroad.  He has been laid off for over a year.  They gave him an offer that is impossible to resist! So we chose Clifton Forge, VA.  We will find out next week or the week after whether he will get it or not. 

The plus side to it is it's a hell of alot more money! The insurance is sooo much better, unlike what we have now that doesn't cover ANY part of infertility.  I would actually be able to go see an RE (reproductive endocrinologist) which is an infertility specialist.  They do the IUI's and IVF's and stuff like that if all else fails.  So, heres to hoping!!

It will definately be scary and nerve wracking moving to a whole new place and not knowing anyone.  But for the perks and opportunities you can't pass it up!  My husband has the chance to earn more money in the next two years then we've made together in the last 4....which not tooting any horns but we have made quite a bit...

Sooo...maybe my trying to conceive will have to be put on hold for a couple months if we have to move!  Who knows, it would be nice not to be obsessing over it 24/7, at least for a couple months! 

I O'd!!! .....

WOOHOOOO!!! I ovulated on my own for the FIRST time!!  It was a little late, it was on my cycle day 22, they usually like to see it between 14-18 for better egg quality, but I did it!!  I am currently 3dpo (days past ovulation) so I have 2 weeks before I could get a positive pregnancy test.  Not really expecting that I will, but at least it is a possibility and all without the aid of any medication!  Doubtful it could happen again without my Clomid...but at least it happend once!  If anyone is trying to conceive and you want to know when you are going to ovulate or want to confirm ovulation through BBT (basel body temp) fertilityfriend.com is a really good site for that.  You put in your temp every morning and it does all the work!  If you get a temp dip then you are ovulating, then right after within the next two days you get a temp spike that stays up and that confirms that you ovulated.  Super easy! You can check mine out, it's pretty cool!  http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/2b6cec  The red lines mean it caught the ovulation for you.  The OPK's are Ovulation Predictor Kit tests.  I take them every day until I get a positive, it is a back up to my back up.  Sometimes with PCOS opk's don't work, so I check my cervical mucus, temp, do OPK's, watch for signs of ovulation...all of the above!!  If you ever have any questions or you are trying to conceive and need advice you can email me at angelacomment@yahoo.com.

The "Octomom"......

The buzz on this "octomom" is getting old!  It just isn't fair how she makes people think that infertility treatments always end up in such a high mulitiple pregnancy.  Remember that she CAN in fact have children, and she CHOSE to have that many implanted, it wasn't the treatment in itself, it was her personal choice to use all of those embryos knowing that she very well could have all of them stick.  That is nothing like actual infertility treatments.

I think that they have disgraced infertility treatments. Every time I tell someone about my struggles and the fact that I am taking Clomid I get these horrible looks. Then they have the nerve to say "well I hope you don't end up like octomom." REALLY?? Oooo I just want to slap ppl. I think she did it for fame anyways, just seems like she gets to much of a high from being viewed by the public. As for the Duggers. That just isn't right. It is fine if you want to have a big family, it is great if you want to follow your religion, but really. There comes a time when you really need to cut the cord, litterally, and let it go. 19 kids, that is totally unfair to the children. The older kids have to raise the younger ones, every child needs moments/special times with their parents and those children will never have that. They wont get woken up on a saturday morning being tickled because they have to many kids to get up. I just think it is being selfish to follow their religion to that extreme.


I really think we should start our own TV show about women trying to conceive. Show our struggles, heartaches, and pain. Maybe they would see that there are two totally different types of infertility treatments. There are "fertility treatments" for ppl that CAN have babies but instead let their doctors knock them up (like octomom, and most actresses that opt to have twins just because), then there are "infertility treatments" which is the painful side of treatments. Where we would LOVE if our husbands could knock us up, but instead we are forced to have our doctors do something to us that should be private and intimate.  For us it isn't a choice, it's a must.  We don't have any other option.  I wish that I could just say "well I think I am going to do IVF because I want twins, or because I am a self centered, irresponsible individual that just wants 14 kids because I can't find anyone else to love me" 

While I do not spend my time hum-ho'ing about these people, I do feel that they are completely out of line, and I am ashamed that the octomom is the face of infertility when she has NO idea what it is actually like.

So if when you think of Infertility you think of the "octomom", unfortunately you are completely mislead.  She chose that, it was a choice.  With infertility it isn't a choice, and we don't get the option to chose how many embryos we want put inside of us.  The most, most doctors will do is 2 and when you have fertility issues it is pretty unusual for even ONE to work.  So do not face your facts about infertility on her alone.

Step mothering...

I am a step mother to a 9 year old girl (who thinks shes 16).  Yeah yeah, you see the word "step mother" and your nose crinkles.  You think of Snow white, or cinderella.  Most of the time I feel like those step mothers by the looks I get, but I believe I am far from either of them.  I never knew how difficult it would be to be a step mother to a child.  WOW.  It is by far the most stressful, hurtful, painful experience of my life!!! 

When you think of mother what do you think of?  Cooking, cleaning, laughing, picking up after me, does EVERYTHING for me....right?  That's what I thought too.  Well, she lives with us..full time.  I do everything for her.  Help her with her homework, do her laundry, feed her, do her hair, help her pick out cute outfits, volunteer in her class, welcome sleep overs (6 screaming 9 year olds!!!!).  I don't think anything of these things because that is what a mother does.  Untill..... I get a reality smack across the face and she calls her mom, and says "I love you so much mommy" and turns around and calls me "Angie".   Ugh, every time she does that it takes a little piece of my heart. 

I think what makes it so much more difficult for me is the fact that I am going through infertility issues and have been completely unsuccessfull at having my own biological child.  It breaks my heart to think that I will never have that special thing with my child, that no matter what I did wrong I will always be "mommy".  Right now when she gets mad at me it's "okay ANGIE!" like she intentionally knows she is smacking me across the face with her words. 

Unless you have been here, you will NEVER I repeat NEVER understand.  So don't try to, don't act like you know how it feels.  Don't tell me she will grow out of it, don't act like my feelings aren't at stake here.  Does your child call you "Mommy" or "Daddy" or do they call you by your first name even after EVERYTHING you have done for them?? Yep that's what I thought, so don't look at me like I am crazy or over exaggerating.  I want to see your heart get broken every friggin day of your life and THEN tell me I am overreacting!  What really gets me is how picture perfect she is for her PARENTS and how NOT she is for me.  She is two completely different children.  It is like with her parents we have miss perfect princess and with me I get the wicked witch of the west....I don't know.  I guess when I have a child of my own and they don't have the option to call me by my first name no matter how mad they are, everything will be better. 
INFERTILITY SUCKS ASS!!!!!!!  BE GRATEFUL!!!!






graphics for moms

Infertility taboo topic...

Why is Infertility so hush, hush.  People make it into such a taboo topic.  Why? I was searching for infertility songs because I had never heard one, much to my surprise they are out there.  They are few and far between but the ones that are out there are wonderful, yet the public CAN NOT hear them.  They are considered to be to "emotional & personal".  Okay I'm sorry but you don't think that a man singing about wanting a blow job isn't personal? Or maybe pregnancies, drugs, alcohol, sex; all of these are okay for the public to hear, for children to hear.  How is it fair that we have to sit around listening about people getting pregnant and having babies and being parents but yet the millions of us who suffer from infertility can not listen to a song about our struggles. 

It is like they just don't want to hear about our bleeding hearts and twisted souls.  Because it's real, they are real feelings, they can't be hidden.

It almost feels like when you are walking through the mall the people are staring at you and whispering "look, there goes that infertile girl.." All the people out there with kids that they gave birth to and they are miserable and hate their life because of it, people that think of their children as mistakes.......

I hate infertility.  It sucks.  The worst feeling in the world is wanting something so badly that you can't have even though you know your body was made for that exact purpose.  I have two words for infertility...F**K YOU!!! PCOS SUCKS!!!!  ERRRrrrrr....WHY???????????  I wish infertility and PCOS was a person, I would do horribly unimaginable things to it!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JqfGqOx2iDQ&feature=related

Venting....

Don't ever take for granted the fact that you can get pregnant! Ohhh that irks me off! I am a member of soulcysters.net and there are thousands of us that talk about our struggles with infertility.  Let me tell you it is not a pretty journey!  There are women that will never be able to see what it's like to have their own child.  I am fairly fortunate that I am still young.  Even though I hate hearing that, it's true.  When I talk to women in there late 30's to 40's and they are still struggling to have a child and probably never will I feel lucky that I am young.  There may be more options for me down the road if nothing I do works.  I can not imagine having this yerning for a child and never ever being able to fill it. 

Back a couple months ago, in a town about 4 miles from me, a teenage girl gave birth to a baby on her own and put it in a garbage bag then threw it in the dumpster.  Then she proceeded to go to work as if nothing had ever happend.  REALLY???? I would LOOOOVE to get my hands on that girl.  There are no words to describe what I would do to her!  Luckily the baby survived because someone found it soon enough.  It was on a cold day and there that poor baby lay naked in a garbage bag only a couple hours old.  It was NOT that childs fault it was brought into this world but yet that incubator thought so.  It was HER fault, she had sex, she got pregnant, SHE had a baby.  People like that are worthless and a waste of our oxygen! Someone should strip her down throw her in a garbage bag and throw her away like she was yesterdays stinky trash! I sure as hell would!

Or maybe what about that psychotic woman in 2004 that drown her 2 year old then lived with the body for 2 effing weeks! Ya know what she got? 2 years then released!!!!! What in the hell is wrong with america? You can kill your child and be slapped on the wrist, yet you smoke a joint and go to prison.  Something is f~d up here!!

Giving up this cycle.

Well, giving up on this cycle. :)   Going to take penicillin and get my tooth pulled.  I don't for see any ovulation in my near future and am really starting to believe these pains I am having are yet another cyst that has grown on my ovaries.  Last cycle they were overstimmulated by the Clomid which means they had multiple follicles open to produce multiple eggs.  Each follie that doesn't produce an egg causes a cyst.  LOVELY! Oh well, back on clomid next cycle.  At least I will go into another cycle with a fresh start and painless mouth!  I was going to wait on the tooth but I read/heard that mouth infections and gum disease causes miscarriages....so what's the use to trying so hard if I am putting the embryo at risk from the get go?  Hmmm next month..back to the wonderful side effects of Clomid and Provera.  I hate my life & my body.  Someday..... 

I want to sneeze and get pregnant. To have the honor of being a mother, since there are so many women who could give a rats ass about their children. Mother is a sacred name, something you have to earn. Just because you have a child doesn't make you a mother, any more then having a car makes you a racecar driver (we can pretend all we want but the reality of it is it is showed by the actions we make and the skills that we have) Doesn't work that way.   
On adoption.....strong opinions, viewer discreation is advised!
To those of you that have babies and give them up because you are just to selfish.  You do NOT reserve the right to see that child again. To that child you are non other then an incubator! You were an oven when they were a bun. You are not their mother, you knowingly and willingly gave them to the government to have a worse life then you could have given them. (I am talking about people that have unprotected sex knowing they could get pregnant and can't take care of it and don't care) I really can not stand hearing about a so called "mother" searching for her child she (((gave up))) because she was to lazy to take birth control or have him wear a condom. That childs mother is who ever raised them! Leave them alone and let them be.  What makes a mother is what she does after birth, not carrying the child.
Moral of the opinion. Don't have sex unless you are able to care for a child, no excuses. You have sex, you create a life. And DO NOT piss off a person who is trying so damn hard to have a baby when you don't care about your own.

Headaches!

Okay so hubby is insisting that I go to the doctor.  I have been having horrible miagranes for a couple months and now they are every freakin day!  On top of that the last three days I have felt like poop.  I can not wake up no matter what I do!  I get out of bed in the morning long enough to walk to the couch and fall back asleep, then I wake up long enough to take Aly to school, then fall back asleep.  THEN I lay down with Robert when he goes to bed and I ......fall back asleep.  Today I did all that and then at 11am when I woke up from taking a nap with him I made it out to the couch (barely) and fell back asleep (until 1:30!!!!!).  This has come with dizziness, light headedness & weakness.  I admit this is driving me insane not knowing what in the heck is going on.  I just don't want to go to the doctor because I am sure they will want to give me some kind of pain medicine for the headaches and I can't take them because I am trying to get pregnant! UGH!!!!!!!! Why in the hell can't I be normal? I know there really is no "normal" so to speak but there is pretty damn close.  I just would love to go one week without having any miagranes, or a month that my body actually worked properly and I didn't have to take pills to "try" to make it work........BUT there is no cure for PCOS, so therefore I will never be normal.

Still waiting....

Waiting to Ovulate.  It's like watching a pot of water and waiting for it to boil, except I have to wait days/weeks!!  Really hoping I can Ovulate on my own! Don't think I ever have.  I decided to take a month off from the fertility meds.  Sometimes a break is well needed!  The side effects can really get to you. 

It is amazing what is game when you are trying to conceive.  Before this I was really shy and didn't like to talk about my personal business, now I am more open to sharing my personal life.  Not by choice but because you have so many people asking about when you are having sex with your husband, when you get your period, when you ovulated, all personal questions, they just kind of start turning into public knowledge.  My doctor actually perscribed sex to me and gave me a schedule on when exactly to have it!!  Ever had that happen?  It's all frusterating and confusing.  I have to take these pills from ?-?(this day to this day), then these ones from ?-?, then have sex then take these tests from ?-?, then wait and do this and that and something freaking else.  I wake up every morning and stick a friggin thermometer in my mouth before I can move.  It's called...."temping", or "charting".  I take my BBT (Basal Body Temperature) it tells me if I am Ovulating or if I already ovulated.  EVERY SINGLE DAY!

Word to the wise:

If you know someone who is trying to concieve do NOT say the following....

*Just relax, it will happen.
*You are still young, you have plenty of time!
*You could always just give up and adopt.
*I had a dream you had a baby!!
*When are you going to have a baby?
*Guess what....So & So is pregnant!!
*At least you get to have lots of sex.


So about the adoption.  If you are so gung-ho on adoption how many kiddos did you adopt?  Did you try to have your own child first or did you just go straight to adoption??? Don't get me wrong, I would love to adopt but give me a freakin chance to have my own child first!

About the sex.  When you are trying to conceive you don't have sex anymore.  It is something called BD (doing the Baby Dance).  Sex no longer exists, it becomes mechanical, no emotion no romance....You take an Ovulation test, it is positive so you say "I'm ovulating we have to do the baby dance".  How romantic!

Well....That's it for now.  Waiting continutes........

Intro for myself and my infertility....

Introduction...

Hey-lo! My name is Angie, I'm 24 years old!...Married. Yeah, I think that says it all. So heres my intro to my infertility.

Well this is my first posting! I love to write...not much of a talker but writing, that I can do! I have been wanting to blog about my experiences with TTC and infertility. Let me tell you, it realllly stinks! While most women can sneeze and get pregnant there are us infertile ladies that spend every waking moment trying to have a baby. If you are shy about going to the OBGYN to get your yearly pap and don't like showing your "hoo hoo" to just anyone.....then infertility is definately not for you! Welcome to legs spread open hell!

So why am I infertile... I am the unproud owner of a wonderful thing called Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome....or better known as PCOS. Just a few things I have the pleasure of "suffering" from..:

*Male pattern hair growth.
(yep, you guessed it! Chest, face, stomach, back, toes, fingers...you name it grows there & I shave/wax/pluck it off... I spend at least an hour a day plucking)
*Infertility
*No Periods
(while most of you are thinking how awesome that would be, it's a real pain in the ass if you want to have a kid!)
*Don't Ovulate
(yay me!)
*Hair thinning...
(you know how you joke to your dad about how his hair is leaving his head and growing on his back...yep that's me. 24 and going to be bald before I'm 30....I'm sure)
*Ovarian Cysts
(or what we PCOSers like to call "The Pearls of Doom" Because the cysts look like a string of pearls around the ovary)
*Depression
*Insulin Resistance
*Adult acne
*Weight Gain
*Almost impossible to lose weight
*Almost guaranteed to have Diabetes
*High Risk of Heart attack
*High Risk for stroke
*High Risk for high blood pressure
*High Risk for Heart Disease

So doesn't this sound awesome! Wouldn't you just love to vacation in PCOS land...hmmm, totally not fun! I have had it since I was 13, and told when I was 16 that I would never have children...Who in the hell would tell a 16 year old that?? Well my doctor did. I went through some major depression issues.

My current potion for my Infertility is:

Metformin (insulin resistance)
Clomid (fertility drug)
Evening Primrose Oil (to make my skin look ravishing...or maybe for the hormone imbalance)
Prenatals (on the off chance that I will ever infact conceive)
Provera (to jump start my periods)

Ohhh and the numorous side effects that each and every pill have....that of which I have the pleasure of enduring.

Well I guess that about sums it up.....stay tuned!